Sudah lama saya tidak bersembang lama dengan seorang kawan bernama Kak H dengan mengeluarkan pendapat-pendapat yang serius. selalunya apabila kami berhubungan, biasalah isu- isu keluarga, anak-anak dan perkara-perkara ringan yang tidak perlu difikir lagi setelah telefon bimbit dimatikan.
Namun, semalam, isu yang dibincangkan agak mencabar minda saya, di mana, pendapat dan nasihat saya kepadanya tidak boleh diselangi dengan senda gurau, kerana ianya berkaitan dengan akidah sebagai seorang muslim.
begini kisahnya, Kak H mempunyai masalah yang berpanjangan dengan suaminya. Tentulah tidak logik untuk saya seorang ibu tunggal untuk memberi nasihat kepada seorang yang masih sayangkan perkahwinan, namun rungutan terhadap suaminya tidak putus-putus. kadangkala, ingin saya utarakan soalan yang begini bunyinya 'kalau Kak H boleh tukar telinga saya ini kepada telinga seseorang, siapakah yang Kak H bayangkan sekarang? ' pastinya tentu telinga suaminya.
Kerana ketika itu, saya seolah-oleh 'sounding box' untuknya. Cukuplah dengan jawaban 'ya' atau hanya dengan 'hmmmmm......ok', sudah cukup memberi kelegaan kepada beliau. Sudah bertahun-tahun lamanya saya menjadi pendengar setia yang tidak bergaji untuk beliau.....apakah harga sebuah persahatan sekiranya masa mendengar luahan hati seorang sahabat sebagai khidmat perundingan yang perlu dibayar....
Kak H memberitahu saya bahawa beliau ingin berjumpa seorang 'ustaz' untuk mengubat suaminya kerana menurutnya suaminya tidak berubah langsung walaupun anak sudah lebih dari setengah dozen. Sekiranya saya ingin tulis semula semua rungutannya di sini, pasti akan berjela-jela panjangnya di dalam blog ini.
Saya menarik nafas panjang sebelum memulakan 'ceramah' saya. Untuk memudahkan sidang pembaca yang mulia memahami intipati nasihat saya, saya akan buat dalam bentuk 'list'
1. Bila kali terakhir Kak H pernah duduk dan berbincang secara baik dengan suami Kak H? Jawabnya tidak pernah.
2. Berapa ramai orang yang sudah Kak H ceritakan masalah Kak H ini? Jawabnya ramai juga...
3. Apakah ianya membantu?
Jawabnya, ya, hati Kak H rasa lega
4. Adakah masalah itu selesai?
Beliau diam
5. Kak H, nak jumpa dengan 'ustaz' ni, apa usaha dia?
Jawabnya, mestilah 'ustaz' akan doakan untuk suami Kak H, diakan ustaz mesti Allah dengar doa dia, dulupun Kak H dengar ada 'couple' ada 'problem' sekarang dah 'settle'..cara dia cepatlah yam...
6. Kak H, kenapa tak doa sendiri?
Jawabnya, takkan Kak H nak rawat suami Kak H, dia bukannya dengar nasihat sesapa..Kak H tak mampulah yam...
7. Takkan doapun tak mampu?
Jawabnya, yalah yam....ada juga lah kekadang tu, tapi....
8. Kenapa Kak H?
Jawabnya, Kak H ni orang biasa jer yam
9. Apa bezanya Kak H dengan 'ustaz' tu?
Jawabnya, ish yam ni, mestilah jauh bezanya
10. Siapa lebih rapat dan kenal suami Kak H, 'ustaz' tu atau Kak H?
Jawabnya, tentulah Kak H
11. Kak H kata tak mampu, siapa kata Kak H tak layak doa untuk suami Kak H?
Jawabnya, takde sape kata
12. Habis tu, dari mana Kak H dapat idea 'tak mampu' tu?
Jawabnya, hmmmmm....Kak H sendiri yang fikir camtu yam...teruklah Kak H kan?
13. Kalau disoal kat akhirat nanti, sebelum minta tolong kat 'ustaz' tu, dah minta tolong dari Allah atau belum, Kak H nak jawab apa?
Beliau diam
14. Kalau ditanya, sudah cuba semua cara lahiriah sebelum mencuba cara spiritual, contohnya berkomunikasi cara terus dengan suami, atau sama-sama pergi kaunselling....Kak H nak jawab apa?
Beliau diam
15. Kalau saya katakan Kak H ambil 'short cut' dalam usaha Kak H untuk selesaikan masalah Kak H ni, Kak H marah tak?
Beliau diam
16. Kalau saya katakan, Kak H belum meletakkan apa-apa usaha lagi untuk memulakan usaha lahiriah, kak H setuju tak?
Jawabnya, memanglah...
Kami diam dan seketika selepas itu, beliau bersuara menyatakan bahawa sememangnya beliau tiada kekuatan untuk bersuara dengan suami beliau. Saya mengatakan beratus jam yang beliau telah gunakan untuk meluahkan perasaannya kepada beratus orangpun, tidak akan menyelesaikan masalah, kerana target beliau ialah hanya untuk melegakan perasaannya sahaja. Telinga yang sepatutnya mendengar luahannya itu, tidak pernah mendengar apa yang terbuku di hati beliau bertahun-tahun lamanya. Sampai bilakan keadaan sebegini akan berterusan?
Saya juga 'berceramah' tentang konsep tawakkal dalam erti kata sebenarnya. Inilah masalah orang melayu secara umum, suka mengambil 'short cut' dan bersandar kepada yang rapuh padahal yang pasti boleh menyelesaikan masalah tersebut masih belum diberi 'salam' padahal Dia akan 'berlari ke arah kita, sekiranya kita berjalan ke arahNya'...mengapa tidak diambil peluang ini?
Siapa kata Dia tidak akan mendengar keluhan hati kita? Siapa kata Dia tidak akan mendengar permintaan kita? Siapa kita untuk berkata demikian sekiranya Dia telah katakan bahawa sekiranya berhajat, mintalah kepada Dia. Lainlah sekiranya kita meminta dalam keadaan angkuh, mana mungkin menepati janjiNya sepertimana di dalam AL Quran yang maksudnya lebih kurang...."Aku akan menunaikan permintaan Hamba2Ku"...jadilah hamba yang hatinya merasa hamba, bukan makhluk yang hanya meminta pabila susah atau merasa susah.
Bukanlah saya anti 'ustaz' malah tidak layak untuk saya berkata demikian terhadap seorang ustaz, namun sekarang sebarang bomoh boleh menggunakan pelbagai nama, dan mengungkap pelbagai janji dan jaminan masalah akan selesai, walaupun diakhiri dengan kata 'insyaAllah'..
Soal syirik adalah serius walaupun syirik kecil. Persandaran kepada yang lain selain Allah, di dalam mendapat penyelesaian untuk sebarang masalah, sememangnya sukar ditelah kerana ianya di dalam hati yang tidak boleh dilihat dengan mata kasar. Empunya diri yang tahu, dan persandaran total kepada Allah SWT perlulah dibuat oleh orang yang meminta.
Kadangkala, masalah berpuluh tahun boleh diselesaikan dengan hanya, berkomunikasi secara berkesan. Tidak salah minta orang doakan untuk kita, sekiranya kita tidak menaruh harapan si pendoa menyelesaikan masalah kita, kerana komunikasi antara kita dengan pencipta kita tidak perlunya orang perantaraan.sekiranya rasa diri tidak layak untuk berdoa, atau 'kotor' maka terus perbaiki amalan kita. Sampai bila hendak dibiarkan diri dalam berkeadaan 'tidak layak dan kotor'?
Kak H mengakhiri perbualan dengan ucapan, 'ye lah yam, solat tengah malam pun tak pernah, macamana nak berkomunikasi dengan manusia, komunikasi dengan Tuhanpun belum..macamana Allah nak bukakkan hati suami Kak H, senang aje 'solution' nya sebenarnya...'
Senang bukan? Susah sangatkah berdoa sendiri?
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Monday, December 14, 2009
THE FREEDOM IN E.F.T (MY VERSION)
I was introduced with EFT tapping technique few months ago, by my friend, who has spent thousands of RM to learn about it through a course conducted by some EFT therapists. She visited me when i was helpless, bed ridden and a visit from a friend really sooth the pain a bit. I was quite sceptical at first, but due to the pain was unbearable (pinched nerve), so i just let her did it on me, tapping few points on my face, fingers and hand. After a while after the tapping process, i was getting sleepy and i didnt feel the pain. I repeatedly did it myself when i started to feel the pain again, and since then, i become a believer. What is EFT then? it is EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE.
Frankly speaking i am more keen to talk about being our own hostage in our own body and mind, waking ourselves up from being kept in captivity behind the bars we built ourselves, trapped in our world of understanding that we need to be secular to understand science....and as far as FREEDOM is concerned, this discussion would be more interesting. To whoever wants to know deeper about sense of relativity of the tapping points or rational of doing it, please refer to the link typed below.
http://www.tapintoeft.com/eft-tapping-points/default.html
I have asked myself before, what made the inventor of this technique chose those points and what rational of his choice. so i began my research (simple research) by applying those technique on myself on certain occasion during my moody times, or nervous or sad times, feeling it is believing in it, not just seeing it, realizing the result, which was always positive. yes, it worked!. Through my readings, those points are most likely the acupuncture points. I admire those chinese ancient alternative medicine experts for the findings and scientifically, they are proven correct.
But there is a problem here. Every time, i did the basic EFT tapping technique, i always feel something isnt right, still there is something lacking....i felt that my emotion status was better, but my spiritual is still 'caged' and the energy is still stagnant though i got positive result. Something doesnt flow...So, i decided to investigate and look for the answer. Actually, i dont mean to reinvent the will, its just that I have discovered some additional method that make EFT works better for me. After this, it is about my opinion on how to make EFT become more efficient and effective not just to our physical body but to our mind, emotion and spiritual. I dont force your mind to accept it, but please keep them open :)
First and fore most, this opinion only applies to readers who believe in God The Almighty, The One and The Only...why? For me, everything is from God, the past and future of good and bad is from Him. Giving an opinion like an agent to Mr Darwin's product of ideas, would defeat the purpose of my writings, thus i opted to relate my opinion to the fact that we are His creations, and creations need guidelines from their Creator to achieve or obtain something. Ways, methods and techniques can be invented by the brainy but perfection still belongs to the Creator. Anyone can claim he or she has the formula of succes, but is it really a formula or methods to get succes? God created succes and He also created the formula for it. On the other hand, i feel that, applying EFT without relating it to God, is similarly an incomplete rituals. To atheis out there, you are most welcome to read my opinion and i hope that it would be an eye opener if you were doing some 'soul searching'.
Still about why i relate this technique to God. Allow me to give an anology here. If we were to enjoy a conversation, we would surely want a good listener right? and if we ask something and get a prompt answer, that is a credit. Then if we seek advise and the listener gives a good suggestive advice, we would be better than happy. Then, if we ask for something physical, a glass of water for instance, and the listener gives us a glass of refreshing water, our thirst shall go away and that is really a bonus. Hmmm...what has this got to do with EFT? Got confused? stay with me. I am getting into it. Just be patient and continue reading, please.
Tapping and telling ourselves repeatedly is actually affirming and believing in what we are telling ourselves to trust that everything is coming true. Here is my modified methods..When tapping ourselves, tell ourselves that as a human being, no one is perfect and no one can escaped from being tested. Life has its ups and downs. An innocent healthy baby cries and laughs for unknown reason sometimes. Death, poverty etc can strike to anyone, and happiness can be ripped of from any family without any warning...(i dont like to talk about negative things, so i will skip this examples)..
When those things happened to us, relate them to God, let go of everything, release the feelings, admit them, accept them, let go of all the feeling of down, sorrow or sadness, yes, we might be the cause of our own mistakes/failure or whatever that resulted from our wrong doings, but still, confessing and thanking it all to God creates such a big relief. Then, tell God (while tapping, we accept wholeheartedly this mishaps, this misery, this problems...or we hope to get this, to achieve that, we see that money is coming, is waiting, we see that succes is just 'playing hide and seek' with us waiting for the right moment to 'show of' itself , we see that all the misery would change to happiness etc etc...then start to tap all the points..We 'knock' the 'door' of our creator, acknowledging Him that we now understand or at least try to comprehend the situation we are in, then we 'knock' our 'door' informing our sub conscious mind, to prepare our body to step forward, alert and we do accept the current condition and wish everything to be lifted to a better one.
Ok, comparatively, lets say, we put God aside. We never failed in getting what we want or asked for (using EFT) Everything seems smooth and all wishes had come true. Lets check the impact now. Check your heart. Do you see others? Do you need others? No, you dont! all you need is YOU and your fingers to do the tapping. You have the ultimate power to get what you desire for, that the only one you need is you, who can change your lives without placing any effort and everything at your own fingertips..
Tell me now, what is the difference between you and The Pharoah? You would become the arrogant society who boast that you grant your wishes, you give wealth and health, ITS YOU, YOU AND ALL ABOUT YOU....hmmm...you dont need the universe to respond then, no need for the positive energy to be derived/extracted from the hope or thoughts, no need to relate whats the function of our pituitory glands, or where the adrenaline pumped to and its the effect to our actions..thus, we can throw the Law of Attraction theory into the drain now.
My valued readers, about getting what we dreamt of, Islam has the solution from thousand years ago, stated in the Quran, telling us that we can work to change our fate, and that, God will prone/follow to our thoughts, if its good, that He will grant it and allow it to happen. Thats the REAL FORMULA. So, whatever technique one can invent, will surely work as long as the formula is right, correct and precise. So, God has formulated the easiest way to get what we want in our lives. Hope, thought, feelings, universe etc etc etc are just tools...and they are created by God. Didnt you notice that God has been the best 'listener' all these while, and prepared 'a glass of water' for us, even we ourselves havent realize that we are thirsty. That is what my anology mentioned above is about. All you need is a good 'conversation' with Him.
Well this is how i understand and accepted EFT. For me, this is an advance way of inner communication within ourselves, and also as one of a way to pray (du'a) and ask from God. I know i did some unauthorised alteration, adding some technique to EFT, but paying some appreciation to God and relate everything to God wont harm anyone nor cripple the basic technique, i suppose. I just talk to The best 'listener', telling Him and seeking His blessings..and ask Him on whatever that i would tell myself, i would be really achieving, so is that a crime?. I feel that my rituals technique is in order and i know i am doing it right in my own version. Well it worked for me, and i thanked the inventor of the technique, but above all, i am so grateful to the Creator of the formula of all this, as i am feeling the FREEDOM now.
Frankly speaking i am more keen to talk about being our own hostage in our own body and mind, waking ourselves up from being kept in captivity behind the bars we built ourselves, trapped in our world of understanding that we need to be secular to understand science....and as far as FREEDOM is concerned, this discussion would be more interesting. To whoever wants to know deeper about sense of relativity of the tapping points or rational of doing it, please refer to the link typed below.
http://www.tapintoeft.com/eft-tapping-points/default.html
I have asked myself before, what made the inventor of this technique chose those points and what rational of his choice. so i began my research (simple research) by applying those technique on myself on certain occasion during my moody times, or nervous or sad times, feeling it is believing in it, not just seeing it, realizing the result, which was always positive. yes, it worked!. Through my readings, those points are most likely the acupuncture points. I admire those chinese ancient alternative medicine experts for the findings and scientifically, they are proven correct.
But there is a problem here. Every time, i did the basic EFT tapping technique, i always feel something isnt right, still there is something lacking....i felt that my emotion status was better, but my spiritual is still 'caged' and the energy is still stagnant though i got positive result. Something doesnt flow...So, i decided to investigate and look for the answer. Actually, i dont mean to reinvent the will, its just that I have discovered some additional method that make EFT works better for me. After this, it is about my opinion on how to make EFT become more efficient and effective not just to our physical body but to our mind, emotion and spiritual. I dont force your mind to accept it, but please keep them open :)
First and fore most, this opinion only applies to readers who believe in God The Almighty, The One and The Only...why? For me, everything is from God, the past and future of good and bad is from Him. Giving an opinion like an agent to Mr Darwin's product of ideas, would defeat the purpose of my writings, thus i opted to relate my opinion to the fact that we are His creations, and creations need guidelines from their Creator to achieve or obtain something. Ways, methods and techniques can be invented by the brainy but perfection still belongs to the Creator. Anyone can claim he or she has the formula of succes, but is it really a formula or methods to get succes? God created succes and He also created the formula for it. On the other hand, i feel that, applying EFT without relating it to God, is similarly an incomplete rituals. To atheis out there, you are most welcome to read my opinion and i hope that it would be an eye opener if you were doing some 'soul searching'.
Still about why i relate this technique to God. Allow me to give an anology here. If we were to enjoy a conversation, we would surely want a good listener right? and if we ask something and get a prompt answer, that is a credit. Then if we seek advise and the listener gives a good suggestive advice, we would be better than happy. Then, if we ask for something physical, a glass of water for instance, and the listener gives us a glass of refreshing water, our thirst shall go away and that is really a bonus. Hmmm...what has this got to do with EFT? Got confused? stay with me. I am getting into it. Just be patient and continue reading, please.
Tapping and telling ourselves repeatedly is actually affirming and believing in what we are telling ourselves to trust that everything is coming true. Here is my modified methods..When tapping ourselves, tell ourselves that as a human being, no one is perfect and no one can escaped from being tested. Life has its ups and downs. An innocent healthy baby cries and laughs for unknown reason sometimes. Death, poverty etc can strike to anyone, and happiness can be ripped of from any family without any warning...(i dont like to talk about negative things, so i will skip this examples)..
When those things happened to us, relate them to God, let go of everything, release the feelings, admit them, accept them, let go of all the feeling of down, sorrow or sadness, yes, we might be the cause of our own mistakes/failure or whatever that resulted from our wrong doings, but still, confessing and thanking it all to God creates such a big relief. Then, tell God (while tapping, we accept wholeheartedly this mishaps, this misery, this problems...or we hope to get this, to achieve that, we see that money is coming, is waiting, we see that succes is just 'playing hide and seek' with us waiting for the right moment to 'show of' itself , we see that all the misery would change to happiness etc etc...then start to tap all the points..We 'knock' the 'door' of our creator, acknowledging Him that we now understand or at least try to comprehend the situation we are in, then we 'knock' our 'door' informing our sub conscious mind, to prepare our body to step forward, alert and we do accept the current condition and wish everything to be lifted to a better one.
Ok, comparatively, lets say, we put God aside. We never failed in getting what we want or asked for (using EFT) Everything seems smooth and all wishes had come true. Lets check the impact now. Check your heart. Do you see others? Do you need others? No, you dont! all you need is YOU and your fingers to do the tapping. You have the ultimate power to get what you desire for, that the only one you need is you, who can change your lives without placing any effort and everything at your own fingertips..
Tell me now, what is the difference between you and The Pharoah? You would become the arrogant society who boast that you grant your wishes, you give wealth and health, ITS YOU, YOU AND ALL ABOUT YOU....hmmm...you dont need the universe to respond then, no need for the positive energy to be derived/extracted from the hope or thoughts, no need to relate whats the function of our pituitory glands, or where the adrenaline pumped to and its the effect to our actions..thus, we can throw the Law of Attraction theory into the drain now.
My valued readers, about getting what we dreamt of, Islam has the solution from thousand years ago, stated in the Quran, telling us that we can work to change our fate, and that, God will prone/follow to our thoughts, if its good, that He will grant it and allow it to happen. Thats the REAL FORMULA. So, whatever technique one can invent, will surely work as long as the formula is right, correct and precise. So, God has formulated the easiest way to get what we want in our lives. Hope, thought, feelings, universe etc etc etc are just tools...and they are created by God. Didnt you notice that God has been the best 'listener' all these while, and prepared 'a glass of water' for us, even we ourselves havent realize that we are thirsty. That is what my anology mentioned above is about. All you need is a good 'conversation' with Him.
Well this is how i understand and accepted EFT. For me, this is an advance way of inner communication within ourselves, and also as one of a way to pray (du'a) and ask from God. I know i did some unauthorised alteration, adding some technique to EFT, but paying some appreciation to God and relate everything to God wont harm anyone nor cripple the basic technique, i suppose. I just talk to The best 'listener', telling Him and seeking His blessings..and ask Him on whatever that i would tell myself, i would be really achieving, so is that a crime?. I feel that my rituals technique is in order and i know i am doing it right in my own version. Well it worked for me, and i thanked the inventor of the technique, but above all, i am so grateful to the Creator of the formula of all this, as i am feeling the FREEDOM now.
Friday, December 11, 2009
APPRECIATE PAIN
Appreciate pain? weird aye? well not for me. i would like to share a true story about what had happened to me in October 2009, where i was bed ridden for almost 2 weeks having pinched nerve at my neck and every movement seemed so so so difficult. The pain? it was almost similar to frozen shoulder to whoever have experienced it, they would understand how baaaaaad it was...
My good fren, visited me while i was sick, it was a good relief to get a visitor..it was good to feel that someone cares. well, she told me how to deal with pain, as she has experienced frozen shoulder before. Here it goes. We must tell ourselves that this pain is a communication from our body to us, telling us that we need to slow down, or take it easy with strenous kinda work, especially in emotional aspect. Once we have been 'awarded' with pain, tell God that we accept it, gladly and we thank Him for it........yes i know, how is thats so? how would we 'like and thankful' for the pain we got? miracle will come, InsyaALlah...trust me.
Here is the secret. Take a deep breath. Feel the pain, confess that we were overworked or overstressed. Admit all of them. Tell God (in heart) that we accept the good and bad destined to us and place some hope that if the pain is unbearable, give us more strength to handle with it....sometimes the pain ceases away, or we will fall asleep. In my case, i felt so calm, relax and my gland produced some hormon which made me fell sleepy naturally thus i felt no pain. Alhamdulillah, and again Alhamdulillah i am back to normal :)
Try this, it cost us no penny.
TODAYS QUOTE : IT WORTH TRYING
p/s taking sleeping pills to 'forget' pain, is one bad idea
My good fren, visited me while i was sick, it was a good relief to get a visitor..it was good to feel that someone cares. well, she told me how to deal with pain, as she has experienced frozen shoulder before. Here it goes. We must tell ourselves that this pain is a communication from our body to us, telling us that we need to slow down, or take it easy with strenous kinda work, especially in emotional aspect. Once we have been 'awarded' with pain, tell God that we accept it, gladly and we thank Him for it........yes i know, how is thats so? how would we 'like and thankful' for the pain we got? miracle will come, InsyaALlah...trust me.
Here is the secret. Take a deep breath. Feel the pain, confess that we were overworked or overstressed. Admit all of them. Tell God (in heart) that we accept the good and bad destined to us and place some hope that if the pain is unbearable, give us more strength to handle with it....sometimes the pain ceases away, or we will fall asleep. In my case, i felt so calm, relax and my gland produced some hormon which made me fell sleepy naturally thus i felt no pain. Alhamdulillah, and again Alhamdulillah i am back to normal :)
Try this, it cost us no penny.
TODAYS QUOTE : IT WORTH TRYING
p/s taking sleeping pills to 'forget' pain, is one bad idea
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